14 October, 2010

Eat, Pray, Buy.

Ooohhh dear lord what have I done. In the midst of a "quick little break" from writing my thesis (which ironically is saturated with Marxist and cultural studies theory...) I managed to spend $88 shopping online. WHY. DID. I. DO. THAT???

 I was bored? I needed new clothes? I had $88 extra dollars to burn? I wanted to have something to look forward to in the mail? None of the above, except maybe the last one. I DID IT BECAUSE IT WAS THERE. There, in my inbox, an email from a company whose subject line had the word "sale" in it. "Hey, sale!", said the Credit Card on my right shoulder. "You like sales...", it reminded me. I DO like sales! Then the Empty Wallet on my left shoulder spoke to me and said,  "Look you broke ass bitch, is it a free sale? Because it would have to be a free sale in order for you to participate." Then the Credit Card on the right told me to look one last time at those adorable oxfords that are 30% off! And then the Credit Card entered all the information in and pushed the "buy" button when I was trying to negotiate with Empty Wallet on the left and not looking. What a jerk!

I found the Time issues w/ Jonathan Franzen on the cover in a free magazine shelf at the coffee shop. I was reading the article while bartending last night (very slow night), and it said he rids his workspace of all distractions, most importantly INTERNET. He is pretty hardcore, because the dude SUPERGLUES an ethernet cable into the port and then chops the sucker off, so the end is forever jammed in there rendering it Internet-less for all of eternity. WOW. Now that is dedication. And of course removes his wireless card, for which superglue is not necessary (for some reason the superglue thing really impressed me, I guess). I also read somewhere once that his advice to writers was, in essence, to get off the goddamn Internet because you will never write anything when you are connected to it.

Case in point: ME! Good old Me and the 'ol 3 year thesis. Je-sus. This "eliminating distractions" idea is something I need to embrace. Sadly, the supergluing the ethernet cable into my computer is not something that is going to happen. SADLY. Because that is really an awesome idea. I was was thinking of burning my computer when I finishing my thesis, but perhaps I will keep around so I can see how many things I have to superglue into it before I can't find anything more ways to fiddle w/ my computer, and just have to sit there and fucking write something.

Thesis progress: 16 pp of Ch. 1 (and i've been waking up at 6:30Am everyday this week! yay! such discipline.)


Bex said...

Whoa. Superglue????? That's seriously hardcore. Could you imagine the great pv's reaction if I tried that???!!

citizenofpuertorico said...

You should never have your credit card info when you are online. Tell me about it!! Free site to store shipping to a Walmart that is 1 mile away, free shipping from Walgreens, 20% of boots at Victoria Secret, $6 wall plug-ins at Bath and Body works....I think I've made my point.

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