Bender.

Halloween was last week, but let me tell you, it feels like yesterday. Or a couple of hours ago...or a million years ago...I'm not sure which. I am sure that between then and now, i dressed up as a lion, lost my phone in a town 2 hours away(so don't try and call me), obtained a huge ass umbrella from a janitor as a birthday gift, and drank about 3 liters of rum (most of it from inside a coconut). Do I have pictures? Yes, yes I do. In good time, friends. I have a little "recovering" to do before i will have the coherence to operate anything that involves hand eye coordination/thinking.


I suppose a little "recap" would be in order.

Halloween: i get PAID. this ends my 12 days crisis of having no money. halle-freaking-lujah!!! What do I do? I go out to buy a costume, naturally. I take a carro publico, and the driver is somewhere between 85-100 years old. He is severely lacking depth perception, which means he comes to a sudden HALT 6 feet before stoplights, and then does the old stop-go-stop-go all the way to the line. Add this with the fact the car has old man smell, and it's rush hour traffic, and times it by 2000, and you = the worst hour of my live. Christ, and on HALLOWEEN! I'm supposed to be drinking in an hour! How can I do that when I already want to vomit all over the place??

Well, I pull through, needless to say, and several drinks later it is 11:30AM and I feel like garbage all over again.


OK HERE THEY ARE:

me and the posse.














Friday happened to be my birthday -- "the big 2-5, a quarter century of little significant accomplishment", in the words of Will Leitch (blacktable.com)
Was I depressed about it? Not really. A little worried, I would say. Worried in the "christonabikeiam25withnorealcareertospeakofmuchlessloveoranythingofthatothershityouaresupposedtohavebynow" way. But I will not panic, no sir, because life is okay. I'll take some more of it.

I had my first surprise birthday party ever, hosted by my students!! and i will say it was a moment where i regained a sliver of hope in humanity, because shit, these kids have known me for only 3 months and they are planning me a party. Out of the kindness of their puertorican hearts (and a desire of an A in the class). *sigh* Touching, really. I'll show you some pictures as soon as they surface on facebook...

After class, I bounced. Leilani had the getaway vehicle, I had the wine and flask, and we were going on a roadtrip. Where to? Shopping, duh. I hadn't been able to spend money for 12 days!!! The time had come.

On the way there, I discovered I am not a huge fan of lambrusco. Actually, I kind of hate it. It's a little bit "disgusting". Thankfully, I had also brought some rum along. I mean, why not, right? Right. It's 4:30pm and i've already lost my phone.

I guess I would have to say the best shopping find (which regretably neither of us bought) was a Big Papi T-shirt that said, "Your pitcher make Papi laugh"! I am not kidding you!!! it actually said "make", as in, incorrect grammar. As in, i think they are trying to make ethnocentric joke by means of foreign talk, or perhaps a racist one (Big Papi is Dominican). Maybe the guy has actually said that before and they are quoting him, i don't know. But i wish i would have bought it. It was only $10.

We roadtrip to Rincon where i finally, FINALLY get to try this infamous coconut drink that essentially they pick from the tree, machete the the top off and fill it with rum. It was delcious, and I have never spent a birthday drinking rum from a coconut while on the beach. Very pleasant. Must try again in the future. Laybo had this fantastic idea to start telling everyone it was my birthday in an effort to obtain free stuff (because, you know, if youactually tell someone it's your birthday, you look like a jackass. but if someone else tells them, you look all shy and reserved about the whole event)! Works like a charm!!!! Got this free HUGE umbrella from a janitor at a hotel, and some free candy from a bartender (left over from Halloween...gee thanks). He did give me a free new beer when 3 seconds after i had bought one, one of Jaybo's friends failed his arm and knocked it out of my hand. (I forgot to tell you Jaybo is now here). It was actually pretty funny though, because it flew directly into the (shitty) cover band that was playing, and they thought we had thrown it at them because they suck ass. jejejejejejee. Good times, good times.

drank rum from a coconut. this seemed like a good place to dispose of them.


this would be the evidence i've been promising that boone's fucking farm costs $6.45 USD!!!!!!!!!! Sacrelig.